24th Annual Asian Pacific Film Festival..."Queer as Folk" stars turn out for splashy Gala reception!

Queer as Folk star appeared at Festival Gala!

The Gala reception for the Pacific Asian Film Fest was a big splash on Thursday night, attracting a host of well-heeled celebrities, along with an eclectic mix of media artists and curiosity-seekers.

The liquor flowed at the open bar, as the effervescent film enthusiasts chatted each other up to a fever pitch over scrumptious rounds of tasty beef and chicken, succulent mouth-watering fruit of the season, and delectable finger pastries.

As I scanned the room, I was enthralled with the fashion presence.

A number of slender Asian women were smartly dolled-up in chic, sheer, body-hugging party dresses - in distinctive eye-pleasing colors - like coral, turquoise, blood red, cerulean, and canary yellow. A handful of the trendy ladies turned out in full-length designer gowns that skirted the plush carpet below and hugged their elegant chins above with exquisitely-designed high-collar flourishes.

One pretty young gal with porcelain skin wore an outfit based on a traditional Chinese design - "but modernized" - she noted, with a sweet engaging smile. A silk shawl draped about her shoulders embossed with a Chinese character on one side, with intricate embroidery and delicate detailing, accented just right.

The men took the occasion to dress up, too.

Many of the fashion savvy males were turned out sharply in understated designer suits - usually in solid colors - such as black, slate grey, and navy blue. Into the mix, a posse of adventurous dressers ably matched up sport jackets with silk vests and designer jeans. A few wore caps, slouchy hats, and - as was the case with a couple of the artists in the crowd - sported braided pony-tails.

Basically, the high-energy room was packed with a young, lively, with-it crowd; although the attendees ranged throughout the upper generations, which was refreshing on this festive occasion.

In fact, one of the Directors of the Festival, David Magdael - a pleasant, easy-going man with a great personality - noted there has been a surge of younger participants at the annual event in the past couple of years as viewers and as participants in the creative arena.

"A lot of the youth today are not interested in pursuing careers as Doctors or Dentists, as was the norm previously; but rather, are inclined to go into the visual artists and filmmaking as serious career endeavors, now."

The films also took a new turn this year from the formal class-focused bill-of-fare to celluloid pieces that are - "gritty and real" - which he saw as a plus.

"The Machine Girl" is an example of one, which screens tonight at the Director's Guild at 9:30 p.m. (see poster below)

In considering projects for the festival, he was quick to add that the Asian Film Festival is always seeking "new voices". And, work need not always be perfect from a production-value point-of-view, but must show originality and potential.

Obviously, it's an artful question.

He also was thrilled to inform me that 2008 was a big year for female directors.

"Ten directors will be showing their work during the course of the Festival, ongoing May 1st through May 8th at a handful of venues about the city."

There also was a big interest in Filipino entries this year. In fact, one director was also accepted into the Cannes Film Festival which signaled to many that the Asian Pacific Festival is a great springboard for emerging talent across the board.

In conjunction with the Gala opening reception, PING PONG PLAYA screened to a very enthusiastic full-house.

In fact, the red carpet was packed with many of the stars featured in the film - who turned out for the festive event - including high profile "Queer as Folk" stars - Peter Paige and Scott Lowell.
Mr. Paige and Mr. Lowell - to the delight of filmgoers - were quite accessible and strolled through the room ready to engage in chit-chat with fans and film connoisseurs present.

PING PONG PLAYA was a delightful comedy which was well-received by a wild, enthusiastic audience. A review follows in a day or so.

Upcoming highlights include "Kissing Cousins" on May 4th and the "Home Song Stories" to screen on May 8th.

But, there is a lot to choose from - 160 entries in all.

In addition, there will be a number of seminars and panel discussions. And, as usual, many of the films screened will include thought-provoking Q & A sessions after; so, if you're pining to have a chat with a star, or a real live film director, check the schedule to pinpoint an event to actively pursue those intentions.

By the way, if any seniors are interested in learning about Visual Communications, take notice there will be a couple of seminars held later in the week that may be up your alley. For those of us born in a "different" era - who weren't weaned on computers (I remember an archaic device known as the typewriter, for instance) it may provide an opportunity to catch up with all the rich media and technology proliferating in the marketplace today

So, a special thanks to the Film Festival for recognizing this, and offering up the chance to get on board and become part of a vital creative community.

Info: http://www.vconline.org/festival

http://www.julianayrs.com

Cher...Las Vegas Diva headliner! May 6th.

The unstoppable flawless Cher will explode onto the Las Vegas stage on the evening of May 6th - my birthday!

Well, actually I share the "B" day with George Clooney.

Guess it's pretty obvious that any male born on this auspicious day is handsome, irresistible, charismatic, charming and - um - I guess you get the idea!

Undoubtedly, there will be a number of dazzling costume changes for the Pop chanteuse - and a dizzying array of fabulous hairpieces to match up with 'em - sure to make any drag Queen envious!

In fact, I understand that while Cher is performing during her stint in Sin City, a well-known female impersonator will be taking the stage elsewhere in town, with her best impressions of the mega star sure to tantalize.

Gosh - who knows - maybe a handful of the out-of-towners will jot down the wrong reservation number and end up in a swirl of falsies, hair extensions, and tucked-away d**k. Sounds like a scene out of LA CAUX AUX FOLLES, doesn't it?

I remember the early days when Cher and Sonny starred on their CBS Variety show.

At the top of the show, Cher usually sashayed out; then, a gasp would erupt from the rapt audience - followed by uproarious applause - at the sight of Mrs."B" in the latest outrageous Bob Mackie designer gown.

At this juncture, Cher would maneuver a little turn and joyously scream,

"Let's hear it for the dress!"

In fact, in those heady days when censorship was a tad tighter on the airwaves, each week there was a big brouhaha over racy outfits that often caused a multitude of migraines for the CBS execs. Indeed, on occasion, a dress appeared to be nothing more than a skimpy band-aid pasted on here and there about her tanned slender body.

Throughout the opening number, Cher was inclined to flip her long silky strands to one side, as she ceremoniously licked her lips. Yes, the perceptible personality quirks stuck, and were great fodder for impersonators to take a poke at ever after.

Once the top brass at CBS got a gander at "The Sonny and Cher Comedy Hour" on its debut in August of 1971 as a five-week summer replacement series, their collective gut instinct was that this was the hot ticket the network was searching for.

So, when 'Sonny and Cher' skyrocketed to dizzying heights within weeks on the old boob tube, a pact was signed to return in December to replace a mainstay - 'The Chicago Teddy Bears' - on Friday nights at 8:00 p.m.

By the fall of 1973, the slot became a consistent top-ten winner - probably due to the fact it was a high-caliber show which featured talented popular regulars such as - Terri Garr, Freeman King, Peter Cullen, Billy Van, The Unknown Comic, Ted Zeigler, and Chastity Bono (the couple's tot).

By 1973, however, the tabloids were rife with stories of wild scream fests, missed gigs (including a last minute one in Vegas, subbed by Johnny Carson) and reports of Cher sporting a black eye. When the show finished eighth in the 73-74 season, Sonny Bono filed for divorce - and on the heels of the decree - the final episode of the 'Sonny and Cher' was taped.

In the aftermath, CBS signed Cher to star in her own variety series. Not to be outdone by his ex, Sonny proceeded to sign a deal with ABC for his own shot on the airwaves backed by the same producers, writing staff, and regular players from the previous bill-of-fare.

In a jab at Cher, Sonny joked,

"We'll have all the same players," then added, "We'll be missing one, actually".

Sonny’s shot at the big-time was a dismal failure, mostly due to the fact Cher - the cog that kept the wheels spinning - was out of the picture and unable to bolster his morale and the ratings. In sum, the writing was uneven and the guest stars were run-of-the-mill. In short order, Sonny's solo stretch limped into the sunset.

In contrast, the Cher show debuted on Sunday February 16, 1975 with popular guest-stars Elton John, Bette Midler and Flip Wilson.

"I'm scared to death,” Cher said at the time about her own humble offering.

"I'm so afraid of that first walk-out. Here I am alone, naked to the world (huh?). What do you think world? Do you forgive me?"

The series was produced by a long-time writer for "Laugh-In" - George Schlatter - and always started with Cher draped in a dark cape crooning inaudibly at a lone piano in a lackluster start-up. Then, without warning, Cher suddenly threw off the veil - and as the music thumped up tempo - the little whirlwind proceeded to strut to the front of the stage revealing her latest navel-exposing Mackie gem.

The first-nighter was thrilling, but the show quickly slumped in the weeks that followed as the shtick failed to stick. At this juncture, Cher opted to go back to "square one” and team up with Sonny for a follow-up show.

But new problems surfaced in her life.

A quickie marriage to Greg Allman turned into a nightmarish fiasco. What was the lady to do, with a bundle of joy on the way?

In view of the unusual events unfolding, the CBS censors were inclined to look closer at the new spot which was now slotted into the "family hour". With that foremost in their mind, the network complained to the star that her clothes and image were not appropriate for a recent divorcee.

"Suddenly I should start coming off like Julie Andrews?" Cher asked incredulously.

Over the next few weeks, the show's ratings fell steadily, as did the quality of the writing.

'Sonny and Cher' hovered near the bottom of the ratings for most of the second year before limping off the air without so much as a bang. In fact, Sonny and Cher were now a total write-off to the Network, and canceled for good after hosting four different variety series between them in just six years.

Amen!

But, Cher hung in there!

One night I was at the Backlot in West Hollywood a number of years ago when she arrived with Elton John in tow. The idea is laughable now, but back then, the gossip-mongers wagged their tongues about a potential sizzlin' hot affair between the dynamic pop twosome. Well, maybe the clothes-horses talked about frocks and wigs into the wee hours of dawn. Not much else was goin' down, I betcha.

Like the energizer Rabbit, Cher has gone on and on and on...with so many "final curtains under her belt", I can't count!

The Las Vegas extravaganza should be a hoot, though.

Curiously, in recent days, it was revealed that Cher had a novelty "john" installed in her high-end dressing room in Vegas for the upcoming gig. Imagine that, a potty that actually opens its lid automatically and blows up a waft of fresh air into the nether - um - regions. I've heard of bl**-jobs, but this is taking it to the max, don't 'ya think?

I trust Cher will avoid wailing - "Gypsies, Tramps, and Thieves" - this time around; and, any outfit inclined to conjure up the theme. A little tired now, don't you think, Cher?

And, stay clear of oddities like "Half Breed", too. The political climate has changed since your hey-day, Ms. C. Be politically correct, please!

The humor can stay, though. And, the muscled back-up go-go boys are a must!

Did you know that Cher used to practice signing her signature for hours on end when she was a pimply-faced teenager, 'cause she knew she would be famous one day?

Amazing confidence, when you consider her humble beginnings.

Born in El Centro in California in 1946, Cher was a sad fatherless child. And, Mom was an eight-times-married failed show-biz performer who struggled by on occasional singing gigs and brief movie roles. According to biographers, Cher delightfully watched her mother’s nervy career pursuits from the sidelines and pined to be in the spotlight, as well.

For personal reasons, the starry-eyed youth ended up dropping out to take acting lessons in Tinsel town. She stumbled along her new path until she met an intriguing man - Sonny - who would change her life at the age of seventeen.

The moment was a turning point for the shy teen.

Cher met her future husband at Aldo's Coffee Shop, the place where celebrities used to hang out. Since Cher was basically a nobody with fantasies about pop stardom - Sonny, a bit of a celebrity at the time - swept her off her feet.

In fact, shortly after their first encounter, Cher became attached to the homely - but engaging character - and moved in with him. In those early days, they both swore up-and-down that their relationship was platonic. In spite of the fact they shared an apartment, Cher alleged they slept in separate beds. (!)

Cher's mother tried to separate them, but to no avail. Curiously, one day out-of-the-blue, they did an about-face and professed their love for each other!

In spite of their long drawn-out break-up years later, Cher noted in one biography - "The First Time" - that Bono was the ultimate love of her life and that the two remained amicable despite their personal differences and subsequent hardships.

Cher confessed in one intimate moment,

"What you saw on TV with Sonny and Cher was a good representation of our personal life, always laughing and having fun".

Perhaps the solid footing between the two is the reason why Sonny and Cher hit gold with their single - "I've got you Babe" - when it first hit the charts. For some inexplicable reason, the song - and the curious couple - resonated in the hearts of teenagers - and parents alike - around the Nation in those innocent days.

"The Beat goes on" and "Baby Don't Go" followed, boosting their image in the industry somewhat, too.

Sonny's off-beat attire and Cher's far-out fashion schematics - featuring colorful hip-hugging pants, skimpy tops, shaggy hair and fur vests - appealed greatly to the hipsters and fans who wanted to emulate them.

Life turned in a different direction after their daughter Chastity was born in 1969, though. The intense spotlight caused problems; consequently, the home life of the winsome threesome became hectic and unstable. On stage Cher was calm, but she noted to the press that - "backstage was turbulent" - and that she felt trapped.

Cher stated in her biography,

"The only way I could continue life happily was to split with Sonny and bring our show to a premature end." She continued, "This devastated our fans, as well as CBS executives, but it had to be done, I was simply, unhappy with my life."

In the end, stardom pulled Cher's marriage down; but, the media attention on Cher propelled her into the super stratosphere as she dated new beaus. Usually, quite young!

The brief marriage to Allman ended up in divorce due to the musician's addictions to booze and heroin.

When that sad scenario ended, it appeared that at 33 - the unemployed single mother was all washed-up - career-wise.

But then, as if by a miracle, Cher was cast in a movie called 'Silkwood', opposite film great, Meryl Streep.

Cher recalls poignantly,
"I will never forget the time Silkwood premiered in New York. As soon as my name was mentioned, the audience laughed. I felt so bad, but you know, you can't argue with these things, it's just a natural, organic response from the audience."

However, Cher had the last laugh when she was nominated for an Oscar!

In fact, by 1987, Cher was in such demand that she found herself in three important feature films at once, "The Witches of Eastwick", "Suspect" and "Moonstruck".

At 41, after twenty-five years in show biz, Cher was on top again.

To her surprise, she sauntered back into the music arena in a stupendous way with a surprise hit - "If I could turn back time" - in which she flaunted her sexy appeal - in an enticing risqué outfit as she wantonly pranced around on a ship full of young soldiers. The result? She garnered a big buzz in headlines around the globe, once again.

In the nineties, Cher re-invented her music persona, in fact.

But, as she was riding the crest of a wave of success, tragic news struck.

Sonny was killed in a skiing accident.

"I was in London in January 1998 when I heard the dreaded news. Chastity rang me and brought the news of Sonny's death. I dropped everything and fled to Heathrow Airport and the media watched my every move. Even though we had been apart for over 24 years I couldn't ignore the fact that I spent a quarter of my life with this guy."

Full of remorse during her reconciliatory eulogy at his funeral, Cher praised the man who had been father, partner, friend, and foe - displaying a side of herself the world had never seen. Though hurt by endless criticism that her appearance at the funeral was an attention-seeking devise (they didn’t look like crocodile tears to me) Cher continued to mourn openly and pay tribute to Bono in a sentimental CBS documentary.

By March 1999 - looking as glamorous as ever - Cher was ruling the Top 40 charts and holding the number one spot four consecutive weeks with her new title song, "Believe".

How to define Cher?

Well - she's a survivor - first and foremost. Then, a pop singer, TV Star, Academy Award-Winning Actress, Disco Diva, home decorator, and fashion icon.

Although Cher's been written off countless times in the past, she just springs back and conquers anew each year, each decade.

For an original ugly duckling, you've come a long way, Babe!

Now, on to Vegas, for more glorious moments in the sun.

See 'ya there!

US Bank rip-off....US Bankcorp engages in fraud with Skylight Financial; Americans bilked by scam!

A few weeks ago, I posted a warning notice to Consumers about a company - IDTECHS - which was involved in a wide-spread scam to illegally debit funds from accounts without authorization.

In various e-mail communications, consumers were blindly offered advance pay-day loans. However, the initial offer was just a fraudulent scheme to obtain bank account numbers so that IDTECHS could illegally debit funds without the prior knowledge of the account-holders.

For example, after the Bank Card clients provided their account numbers for funds to be deposited, IDTECHS proceeded to debit funds for "insurance charges" and "fraud protection" coverage - in spite of the fact the options were not chosen.

When consumers checked their account balances to determine if the loan funds were deposited, they got quite a shock when they discovered that - instead - money had been debited from their accounts on false pretenses.

Then, when the consumers called the 800 number provided by IDTECHS on the bank statements, they got the run-around from the company - and generally - a blatant refusal to reimburse the funds.

One employee argued that the consumer had checked a box for insurance on the loan - and that even if they were not approved for the cash advance - they were still required to pay for the insurance - which later was established to be bogus, too.

When I posted a warning about this scam, in the ensuing weeks thereafter, about two dozen victims were able to locate my blog post through an Internet search on IDTECHS, and have since poured out their woes to me at the blog site.

February 6th.2008 Post:

ijulian.blogspot.com/2008/02/wwwidthecscompay-loan-scam-fraudulent.html

In spite of complaints with the Better Business Bureau and the FBI, victims are still being ripped off as of yesterday.

But now, it has come to my attention that due to this scam - another one has been uncovered at US Bank and their fraudulent subsidiary - Skylight Financial.

One contact of mine went to U.S. Bank the other night to withdraw funds which were being automatically deposited into his account at midnight and was shocked to be denied access to his own account! A message onscreen informed him that the ATM service was not available, in spite of the fact the funds were in his account.

When he called the 800 number on the back of his Visa Debit Card, a tape-recorded message from the U.S. BANK Subsidiary - Skylight Financial - noted that the business office would be closed until 9 a.m. the following morning.

My friend was in shock! He was down to a dollar in his wallet, with just a trickle of gas in his vehicle. Without the funds, he would not be able to eat or put gas in his car so that he could drive home.

At this juncture, he called VISA International to ask for "emergency" assistance.

When VISA checked the account number, they were able to verify that the debit card was valid, and that there did not appear to be any reason for a denial of access to funds.

According to their records, though, U.S. BANK - not Skylight Financial - was listed as the issuer of the VISA Debit Card.

When the kind operator put the card-holder through to US Bank, they stated that they did not have any "access" to the account, and consequently, could not make a determination as to why the request for funds was denied at the ATM, or even give authorization for issuance of emergency funds.

The operator informed the consumer he would have to wait until the following morning when Skylight Financial opened at 9 a.m. to determine what the problem was with his account card.

Imagine that! My friend was forced to sleep in his car overnight, without dinner, and huddle in the cold throughout the chilly evening until the bank answered the phone in the morning.

In the morning when he spoke to a couple of operators, and asked to speak to a supervisor - at first - the brisk employees put him on hold, then proceeded to rudely hang up on him.

When he finally reached a Skylight representative with a modicum of professionalism about an hour later - and after being put on hold for about thirty minutes - he was informed that a restriction had been placed on his card because of an "unauthorized" charge dispute he submitted in respect to IDTHECS.

Yup, the scam originally reported on this blog, weeks ago.

Although Skylight agreed to "lift" the restriction so he could access his cash that morning, they informed him in a huff that the account would be closed the next day (May 2nd) on the grounds that he was a "risk".

My friend was in a panic because he was expecting a second payroll account deposit at midnight - which meant - he might not be able to access those funds!

When he became angry and noted he had not been given any legal notice of the intention to close his account - and that the many other Americans suffered the same illegal access to accounts by IDTECHS - the operator began to make silly excuses and gave him the bum's rush.

"We can close your account at any time," she snapped at him.

"Besides," she added, "We prompted you for a few days to inform you about the closure, so it's your fault for not responding."

My friend did not receive any so-called prompts. In fact, when he checked his balance the day before on the telephone and the Internet, there were no notices to that effect. Notwithstanding, his account with the bank had been in good-standing for over two years before the unauthorized charge by IDTHECS.

What an absurd notion, to punish an account holder because they were victimized by an embezzler accessing their account - no doubt due to a lack of bank security, yet!

When he argued these points, the operator got annoyed and became rude and insulting, so my friend asked to speak to the Manager. Not surprisingly, the woman claimed the Director - Patricia Wys - was not available.

The Skylight employee would not disclose a contact number for the President & CEO for Skylight - Kevin Lee - noting in a snotty voice that she was not required to give out the information.

At least three lengthily messages left on the Patricia Wys voice mail unit remained unanswered, in spite of the emergency.

In retrospect, it appears that Ms. Wys was "hiding" and did not want to be bothered dealing with a crisis situation where a client was illegally denied funds, treated reprehensibly by staff, and suffered injury due to bank negligence, a breach of an agreement, and Violations of State & Federal Bank regulations.

However, the bizarre story does not end there.

When my friend withdraw all but six dollars from his account, he later checked his balance, and was shocked to notice that an "internal transfer" in the sum of $70.00 had been debited from his account that morning after he talked with the bank employee; now, placing his account into an overdraft status of about sixty-one dollars.

What was going on?

He called Starlight back and was informed that an old account that was closed (over a year ago) had an overdraft balance of $70.00 and that the Bank made the debit that morning to cover the loss.

The new turn of events didn't make any sense.

My friend pointed out that the allegations of a previous overdraft were ridiculous. After all, why would the bank open up a new account with VISA access to ATM's if his prior account was not in good standing? Notwithstanding, no one ever contacted him from the bank asking for payment, or allowed him to dispute the alleged charges as required by law.

When my friend asked how the charges occurred, Paco Costa - a bank person who was reluctant to provide any information about his exact position with the Starlight Financial - alleged that charges for a Gold's Gym Membership (Gold's Gym is notorious for their deceitful business practices; a story will follow) were submitted on the account - "after it was closed".

Can you imagine? The bank was seeking to recover charges (a year after-the-fact) on an account that was officially "closed"?

My friend noted how ludicrous a notion it was. Then, it got even more sinister.

When asked pointedly about the alleged charges, Paco Costa was unable to provide a contact number or proof of any alleged debits made to Gold's Gym on the telephone. In fact, at this juncture, Mr. Costa admitted that the Gold's debit requests had been returned unpaid. The $70.00 charges debited that morning were accrued by virtue of $15.00 NSF charges the bank imposed on the unauthorized charges that were submitted on the "closed account".

Insanity.

Imagine that, a bank affiliate - associated with one of the leading banks in the country - U.S. BANK - engaging in such wild, deceitful, fraudulent conduct.

Paco Costa didn't have any response when the obvious questions were raised on the issues. How could he? Clearly, the man was not dealing with a full deck - and obviously - had an IQ of about 2, if that.

Of course, it is wholly possible that the reason my friend was able to run circles around Mr. Costa - in the logic department, for one - was because Costa was aware that - he, Patricia Wys, and Kevin Lee (CEO of Skylight) - were in deep sh** over their illegal, wrongful conduct which was in direct Violation of State & Federal Laws. And, in view of it, he'd better be careful about the comments he made on record.

In fact, after reviewing the facts and evidence in these quarters, it is evident that US Bank set up Skylight Financial to rip off "poor" Americans.

For example, if a consumer applies for a US Bank card online, and their assets are low or their credit is spotty, US Bank offers a "Skylight Financial" card for consumers who have regular payroll deposits or a direct deposit of Government Benefit checks, like Social Security.

Initially, to open the card, the consumers are charged a hefty start-up fee. If they are unable to open an account elsewhere due to credit issues, what else can they do? They're at the mercy of sharks like US Bank and Skylight Financial, obviously.

It should be noted that when the account is first opened, the ATM card that is provided for bank access does not bear the VISA or MasterCard logo; in fact, the account card for Starlight Financial can only be used at US Bank and their participating ATM's.

Then, lo and behold, one day - out-of-the-blue - Starlight suddenly offers up an ATM card with a VISA logo on its face...for an outrageous fee, of course!

And, if the consumer is capable of reading and comprehending the tiny fine print - and manages to decipher them - it becomes evident that the access charges and surcharges are so ludicrously high - that they border on being illegal, if not downright criminal, in nature.

And, as my friend found out last night, US Bank may not be providing the VISA card to Skylight Financial clients in an upright, legal manner which abides by their Bank charter, business licenses, or even State & Federal Laws, either.

For example, when VISA contacted U.S. Bank - which was the issuer, according to their records - US Bank was unable to verify the account status, or establish why my friend had been denied access to his account.

In sum, it appears that Starlight Financial is using U.S. Bank’s privileges as a registered Bank to facilitate the VISA logo, and that VISA International was never informed of the "shadowy" - perhaps illegal - business/banking arrangement.

In fact, when I spoke to Vice President of Consumer Relations - Lynne Cherry - she admitted that Skylight Financial isn't even a Bank. In addition, they appeared to be owned by another shady division of U.S. BANK, by the name of Elan Financial Services.

What a swirl of intrigue, eh?

After I spoke with Ms. Cherry, a U.S. BANK logo mysteriously disappeared from the Skylight Financial web site today.

Bottom line, it's all part of a master plan to rip off millions of poor unsuspecting Americans around the country, once they take the bait and walk through the deceptive "legitimate door" of a major Financial Institution - U.S. BANK.

Talk about a wolf in sheep's clothing!

I trust that investigations filed with the Thrift & Loan, the office of the State Attorney General, and VISA International, will uncover the fraudulent scam being perpetuated on innocent consumers and that - likewise - the key players will be prosecuted for their heinous financial crimes against the lower classes who can't fight for themselves in a scam of such byzantine proportions.

Divine Presence...appears. Message of peace!

Throughout the night, I was restless - tossing and turning - this way 'n that.

Suddenly, at about 5 a.m., a Divine presence appeared and hovered overhead.

For a moment, as the entity unfolded before me - and revealed its awesome light - I thought I was going to be enveloped by it, swept up.

But, a message was communicated telepathically...not my time yet.

After a serene moment of peace, the light vanished into thin air as quickly as it appeared.

To be continued, I am sure.

24th Annual Asian Pacific Film Festival...Visionary filmmakers, to inspire and uplift!

The 24th Annual Asian Pacific Film Festival kicks off tomorrow with a VIP Reception and Gala Soiree to follow.

The Festival runs - May 1st through May 8th - at a handful of accessible venues - the DGA, Laemmle's Sunset 5 Theatres, ImaginAsian Center, The National Center for the Preservation of Democracy, and the Aratani/Japan America Theatre. (Los Angeles)

The annual event - formerly known as the VC Film Fest - has been resurrected as the Los Angeles Asian Pacific Film Festival.

Known globally as Southern California's largest and most prestigious film festival of its kind - the fest launches the annual celebration of "Asian Pacific Heritage Month" through an exciting slate of 160 films and videos from both Asian Pacific American and Asian international directors.

A bumper crop of features by Asian American female directors will be prominently unveiled throughout the festival which kicks off - PING PONG PLAYA - directed by Oscar® winning Jessica Yu.

"THE HOME SONG STORIES" - a feature-length drama by Australian Director Tony Ayres starring Joan Chen - will screen at the closing night festivities.

Notes on the Highlighted films:

PING PONG PLAYA (May 1st)
The premiere of PING PONG PLAYA marks filmmaker Jessica Yu's comedy feature debut starring Jimmy Tsai, Roger Fan, Elizabeth Sung, Smith Cho, and Andrew Vo.

KISSING COUSINS (May 4th)
Filmmaker Amyn Kaderali brings his debut film to this year's festival. It's an intriguing tale about an enterprising "relationship termination specialist" who provides "dumping services" for his lovelorn clients.

The much-anticipated feature stars Samrat Chakrabarti, Rebecca Hazlewood, Gerry Bednob, Zack Ward, Jaleel White and David Alan Grier.

THE HOME SONG STORIES (May 8th)
Australian-based director Tony Ayres presents a captivating family story with a distinct twist. Joan Chen shines in one of her most powerful performances as a glamorous Shanghai nightclub singer (and mother of two) who migrates to Australia in search of a better life for her family.

In addition to the centerpiece films noted above, the Festival staff have scheduled a dazzling array of shorts, documentaries, and features throughout the Festival Calendar.

In addition, there will be a handful of exciting seminars and panel discussions.

For example, at the "MEDIA MESSENGERS" forum, Eric Byler and Annabelle Park (along with a handful of other guests) will engage in a dialogue about how filmmakers and actors can activate the Asian-American voter bloc - by embracing innovative media tools and the Internet - with the ultimate aim of leveling the playing field.

A writing seminar - SUCCEEDING AT SCREENWRITING - is sure to be a big crowd-pleaser, as well.

In this informative session, two Chinese Professors who specialize in screenwriting, return for a second year to present a writer's boot camp where attendees will be guided through a 90-minute version of a 10-week workshop normally conducted in the scholarly environs at UCLA.

Included in the package: how to pitch, rustle up script ideas, fathom structure and outline, submit treatments to production companies, and so much more!

A third session - Art of Visual Storytelling - pertains to the actual "art of cinematography" and appeals to filmmakers in particular. Since cinematography has developed into a highly-developed aesthetic form, the focus here is on how to achieve that end - through the use of lenses, angles, lighting, color - you name it.

A guest Director of photography will share secrets on how he turns his visions into dynamic realities on the silver screen.

Personally, I am inclined to participate in what is sure to be a wild adventure:

"THE XIN LU BUS TOUR OF L.A."

The Bus Tour is a large-scale media project which explores the intersections between autobiography, travel, tourism, exile and displacement.

Ming-Yuen S. Ma - the brainchild of the Festival fave - will team up with the organizers to present his four-part series the way that it was intended to be shown: as a mobile bus tour of Los Angeles in which the similarities and differences between the media and real life are referenced, compared, and experienced.

On the trip, there will be screenings of four films:

MYTH(S) Of Creation (USA 1997); MOTHER/LAND (USA 2000); MOVEMENTS EAST-WEST (USA 2003), and (OSL)(USA 2008)

Tickets include a box lunch!

This year the National Spotlight is on the Philippines, therefore, six films from Filipino International artists (including 2 Filipino American directors) will be screened.

According to the organizers, these new filmmakers are fast becoming the "new wave of modern cinema" and the festival has cultivated some of the best from these new visionaries.

And finally, as a special treat, the curious may want to join the writers/directors of:


HAROLD & KUMAR:
ESCAPE FROM GUANTANAMO BAY

Jon Hurwitz and Hayden Scholossberg - along with actor John Cho - discuss the films and its franchise which has now achieved "classic" status amongst a new generation.

All in all, the 24th Annual Asian Pacific Film Festival appears to have widespread appeal - so I expect - there will be a large turnout to support the talented filmmakers and the Asian Pacific Community, as well.

No doubt the experience will be a rewarding, uplifting one.

As Ingrid Bergman once said,

"No form of art goes beyond ordinary consciousness as film does, straight to our emotions, deep into the twilight of the soul."

Reverend Jeremiah Wright...A.I.D.S. conspiracy lunacy. White coats, comin' to take him away. Ha Ha, Hee Hee!

Obama says you've got it all wrong, Reverend...



When I read in the morning paper that Reverend Jeremiah Wright once lamented that the A.I.D.S. virus was part of a conspiracy to wipe out the black population, I laughed.

Well, his theories were a bit refreshing in some respects.

After all, years ago Church leaders preached about a lot of fire and brimstone and alleged that the deadly virus was God's way of punishing "gays" for engaging in immoral acts.

Of course, in support of their arguments a whole posse of 'em were inclined to quote verses from Revelations. You know, all the scriptures that speak of famine and plagues and things that go bump in the night when the day of reckoning comes.

In recent years, however, scientists have been able to determine - because of A.I.D.S. activists like Elizabeth Taylor (who has raised millions in funds for research) - that the virus actually originated in the lowly monkey.

Yes, the nasty infection jumped species.

Looks like a couple of men in white coats (no, not the Ku Klux Klan) may be jumping Reverend Jeremiah Wright in the near future to cart him off to the funny farm if he continues foaming at the mouth about such nonsense!


Suggestions that the virus evolved into the mainstream because of willful deliberate action by a plotting few or the result of a vaccine that went wrong - are a preposterous notion - at least to those with a modicum of intelligence and common sense.

The man is a lunatic!

Prophetic leader?

How about pathetic loser!

Amen.

Don Johnson...dines alfresco, a little worse for wear.

I know I shouldn't have - the old waistline will be feelin' it tomorrow - but I took a break from a bit of editing and headed over to Rite-Aid for a regular single scoop of Cookies 'n Cream.

Ah, delicious.

On the way back home, instead of turning off on a side street to avoid the madding crowd, I strolled straight up Canon Drive amid the lunch-hour throngs.

Well now, who did I spy dining alfresco at the corner at one of the trendiest in-spots to be gandered at?

Don Johnson.

Gosh, anyone could have just bent over and given him a peck on the cheek!

But, I have to admit, the TIN CUP star was a little worse for wear; tired, and haggard-looking.

Didn't catch a soul scrambling for his John Henry.

Frankly, if I were so out-of-shape - physically down-in-the-dumps - I'd at least don a pair of sunglasses to hide a little of the baggage under those precious peepers.

No pun intended.

Or, is he casting about for a character role?

The image is a far cry from the glitz and glamour of Miami Vice days.

Poor slip-sliding shooting star.

Guess the one-time heart throb was inclined to bask in the glow of a bit of the fleeting fame he has left. But, few appeared impressed by the sight of his cute chops at the popular upscale eatery.

In contrast, I got a ton of attention. Why?

By sheer accident, I ended up straggling down the street a hair's breath behind a young beauty with kno**ers out to there!

So, natch, all the wolves on the prowl - sittin' pretty all in a row 'round their elegant tables dressed to the nines in their pricey Ermenegildo Zegna designer suits - were inclined to stare "our" way.

Funny, that.

It wasn't until I brought it to the young gal's attention (she was on the way to the dentist) that she was aware of the stir she was causing.

Yup, that's the secret.

Don't possess a care in the world, or scheme for a show of things, and all eyes will focus on 'ya.

Maybe it has somethin' to do with the energy one exudes when they're innocent and carefree and - without motive - of course!

Maybe, the "me" generation is fading fast into oblivion, do 'ya think?



In heady days, Don was known for his "Johnson"...

Kenneth Bi..."The Drummer" a compelling spiritual journey. Starring Jaycee Chan!

"The Drummer" (which screened at the Asian Pacific Film Festival) is about a band of ZEN musicians and a troubled young man who stumbles upon their humble community in the mountains of Taiwan.

"For me," noted director Kenneth Bi,

"It began with a stage performance."

After attending a theatrical production by the world-renowned drummers, the genesis of an idea for the feature film crystallized.

Jaycee Chan - son of famed actor Jackie Chan - adeptly plays a lost young man born into a crime family in the mean streets of Hong Kong.

When a gang war breaks out, and a bounty is placed on his head, SID flees to Taiwan to escape their wrath with the help of his father's tainted cash.

One day, the bored young man hears the sounds of drums echoing throughout the valleys of the majestic mountains, which sparks a journey up a path to their humble community.

Over the crest of a hill, he is startled to spy a serene group of men and women pounding on a set of drums in a rigorous, almost sacred manner.

He later learns they are Zen Drummers practising for an upcoming world tour.

Because Chan's character played the drums when he was a youth - mainly to vent his anger and distract himself from the painful memories of a broken home life - he strides up, cocky and full of swagger, and demands to demonstrate his skills on the skins.

When the Buddhists are hesitant to respond, he retorts like any typical spoiled American brat.

"I'll pay you."

It is quickly impressed on the lad that drum-playing is whole different musical experience in this spiritual community.

In fact, the rhythmic playing is not the "be all" and "end all" at all; but rather, part of a Zen philosophy in a holistic approach to life.

When SID begs a teacher for the chance to step forward and display his skills on the drums, a wise Master solemnly responds.

"He teaches you how to play the drums and I teach you 'how not' to."

Moments later, after beating the heck out of the skins (in what amounts to an audition) it is evident to the Masters that while SID is "talented", he is not ready spiritually to join in.

So, like a typical disciple, he is assigned various tasks designed to steer him on the right path.

In essence, he must come to understand the "hearbeat" of the mountain, the meaning of day-to-day existence - and likewise - be able to fathom the rhythms of life itself.

When the angry young man is asked to fetch water for the drummers, he is forced to walk several miles for gas when it is discovered the tank for the water-pump is empty. After a long arduous stroll to purchase the fuel, he toils with his unwelcome burden all the way back to camp.

Frustrated by these seemingly worthless annoyances, he ends up lashing out.

"I'm just a slave to you."

After all, he doesn't understand the methodology of the teacher, or the reasoning behind the daily chores.

The incident reminded me of an old proverb:t

Before enlightenment -
Chopping wood, drawing water;
After enlightenment -
Chopping wood, drawing water.

The Master then asks SID to go down to the stream and pluck up forty rocks and return to the camp with them in tow. Although bewildered by the request, he proceeds to carry out the task. When he returns with the odd assortment of pebbles, SID is then instructed to place the rubble into a satchel.

Once accomplished, he is instructed to carry the bag of stones over his shoulder wherever he journeys around the mountain each day.

For those who are familiar with practice of ZEN, the instructions of the teacher are not entirely bizarre in nature.

A Master glimpses into the soul of the disciple and assigns a koan (a puzzle) for the seeker to solve - one that is uniquely tailored to ensure a disciple's spiritual growth - with the ultimate aim of setting them squarely on their "path".

In essence, the seemingly innocuous teachings aid the student in fathoming their place in the grand scheme of things, so that they may come to know the true essence of existence on the earth plane.

Only in this way, can the mystery of the "moment" be realized.

Mr. Bi noted that when he first arrived in Taiwan, he sauntered up the mountain and stumbled across the Zen Drummers, much like the character does in the film.

"There I was in the wilderness of the mountain. At the top, when I turned and looked back, a modern city sat in the distance."

In a moment of revelation - it struck him that the "people" were living in the mountains - and that the "animals" were stalking the city below.

With powerful insight and expert storytelling techniques under his belt, Kenneth Bi manages to capture the remarkable transformation that occurs for SID on the journey from the dark underbelly of life into the Divine light of the Godhead.

Hillary Clinton...gay rumors persist in tabloids! Old news to G & L community.

When I sauntered into Von's this morning for a cup of java and a doughnut, I couldn't help but notice the screaming headlines at the check-out counter on the cover of a tabloid magazine:

Hillary Clinton Gay Affair!

Well, that bit of gossip has been circulating around the gay community for years.

G & L activists haven't pursued the issue - or put the spotlight on the persistent whispers that swirl around Jodie Foster either - because most have taken the stance that both - if the rumors are true - should be afforded the opportunity to "come out" when they're ready to skirt the idea.

Actually, the titillating thought of the winsome duo in the sack - Whoa Nellie, Hillary & Jody! - is inclined to rev up a few scintillating passions in some.

Although both high-profile celebrities are cool and aloof in the public arena, I just betcha, they're both wild tigresses in-between the sheets, dudes!

Meow.

Theorists allege that the reason Hillary never left Bill over his womanizing - and in particular, the Lewinski affair - was due to the fact the Clinton union is a marriage of convenience. Makes sense, doesn't it?

As long as Bill acts discreetly, and doesn't embarrass her too badly in public, she'll forgo on the heave ho!

And, it suits slick Willy's willy; after all, the prospect of hopping into bed with two lusty women is a great little scenario for the over-sexed former president whose favorite motto is: Don't Ask. Don't tell.

Actually, for many men, fantasizing about a threesome with two Lesbos is quite a turn on!

Yeah, men are such animals, aren't they?

As to Hillary - well, I guess the pant suits make sense now - don’t ‘ya think?

For some, butch is a turn on!

Hillary & Bill same person.
Ever see 'em together?

Ping Pong Playa...delightful comedy. Race stereotypes may stir up controversy!

PING PONG PLAYA, which kicked off the 24th Annual Asian Pacific Film Festival on Thursday, is a delightful off-beat comedy offered up by director Jessica Yu.

Essentially, the low-budget farce is about an Asian male still chasing pipe dreams - in particular, a shot at the big leagues in pro basketball - unable to hold down gainful employment or even conjure up any meaningful direction in his life.

Through a quirky set of circumstances, C-dub (his nickname) - played with great aplomb by actor Jimmy Tsai - is forced to teach ping pong at the family business to a handful of lovable, but hapless kids in the neighborhood.

As the little darlings astutely lament to each other, what choice is there otherwise? Violin, piano, dreaded choir - go figure!

Yes, early on - the film takes a wild jab at the Asian American culture and its values - in a light-hearted, upbeat way.

Director, Jessica Yu (SOUR DEATH BALLS) joked,

"Jimmy and I both saw in C-dub the chance for some healthy self-mockery in our generations navigation of the ethnic American experience. From the oversensitivity of the politicized to perceived racist slights, the impulse to dismiss ethic stereotyping, while simultaneously mocking those who fit the stereotypes, to the resentment of the non-model minority."

That's quite a mouthful!

On occasion, PING PONG borders on the edge of controversy in this regard.

If a big-budget Hollywood production poked fun at the Asian Community - and other diverse groups represented in the film the way Lu has - it is wholly possible there may have been an outcry in the community.

At the Q & A session - when I asked Yu and the cast if the underlying message (in light of all the racial issues discussed in the media in recent days) signaled a need to "lighten up", "have a sense of humor", and "get real" - the response was amusing.

"Actually, we did get accused of white-bashing," Yu chortled. "Because of some of the comments we made about people in Encino."

But, none of the quips in respect to "race" in PING PONG PLAYA are particularly mean-spirited or offensive, to be sure.

But, I have to take note for the record. Last year, at the Los Angeles Film Festival, there was a panel discussion about diversity in Hollywood which focused on how Asians, Blacks, and others were portrayed by the industry.

Some of the stereotypes the panel objected to there - run rampant here.

And, a handful of politically-correct individuals might put forth the proposition that films like "Ping Pong" may perpetuate those myths.

I guess that old adage is true...

It's okay for any ethnic group - or person of a certain religious or sexual persuasion - to make fun of members of their own, but don't anyone else dare!

For the most part, there's a lot of side-splitting shtick and odd-ball humor, with a big satirical thrust on the annual Ping Pong tournament that C-dub must win to ensure the family honor is upheld in the community - and, of course - that sign-ups for lessons on the hot little table keep filtering in.

Enter the competition.

A couple of wacky ping pong enthusiasts (who take the rules of the game "to the max") sashay in and throw a curve ball into the mix.

Peter Paige and Scott Lowell (Queer as Folk) are wildly amusing as a couple of players out to win the tournie, at any cost.

Paige goes all out here, explores new ground as a comic actor, and succeeds admirably in a break-out role.

No doubt, both the gay community - and the straight one - will get a kick out of his characterization of a man who is obviously "gay" to everyone but himself. In the classic tradition of a closeted man, he puffs up his manhood, and all-the-while crows unconvincingly about chicks. Wink! Wink!

To divert attention elsewhere, ya think?

There's a lot of visual humor in PING PONG, too; shots of tight shorts on wiggling butts, kids with odd-ball expressions on their silly mugs which bring a smile to the face, and broad character reactions - right on the money, by the way - that add a lot of hilarity throughout to keep the laughter rolling.

A thumbs up!

Buddha...a conversation with a student!

A student has a conversation with Buddha

"Are you the messiah?" asked a student.
"No", answered Buddha.
"Then, are you a healer?"
"No", Buddha replied.
"Are you a teacher?" the student persisted.
"No, I am not a teacher."
"Then what are you?" asked the student, exasperated.
"I am awake", Buddha replied.

Barack Obama...shifting gears! Self-doubt may lose the race! Let it "be".

I had a dream that Obama @#*!...


Judging by the photo in the newspaper yesterday, Barack Obama appears to be pulling back from the media. For good reason!

In the revealing photograph, Obama looked leery of responding to a gaggle of reporters perched a few dozen feet from the Presidential candidate with their mics and news paraphernalia thrust forward.

A piece of advice, Obama? Just "be".

After all, when "The Candidate" let it be in the past, wasn't that a character trait that was inclined to inspire?

Yes, in the old days, Barack was a confident man...always able to stay on top of things. And - ready, able, and willing - to put his spin on the issues without fear of criticism. On occasion, he was witty; even offered up a refreshing anecdote now and then.

More-often-than-not, he had an uncanny way of putting wily Hillary in her place, too.

Mucho points from the voters for your skills in that department, Sir!

But, as the dems head down the last lap, it appears that Mr. Obama is letting the barbs and political innuendos jolt him, paralyze his thinking - and ultimately - bog him down with doubts about his image, fears that he won't be able to turn the tide back, and reservations about launching counter-attacks to halt Clinton dead in her cougar tracks.

Oh, Hillary's a plotter, alright. In fact, Bill's other half puts Lucy - the red-headed screwball schemer from the hit sitcom - to shame!

I agree, it's time to focus on McCain and start placing bets on the Blue Ribbon Race. Come on Barack, turn your back on that tired old saw horse, Clinton, and sprint to the finish line.

Yessir, Dems are making a big mistake prolonging the slug-fest with Clinton and Obama. If both the hopefuls are not careful, their popularity will fizzle out in a gasp of discontent and disgust. And, it will be reflected at the polls!

So, keep on track, Obama.

The only thing capable of derailing you at this juncture is that evil eye of that conniver, Hillary Clinton!

In the final analysis, maybe front-runner Obama needs a stab-in-the-back - er - a "blessing" from his pastor, Reverend Jeremiah Wright, to make things right as rain again?

Kidding!

Newport Film Festival...Eclectic offerings! Last two days...

On April 24th, the Newport Beach Festival started up and runs through May 1st, 2008.

By all accounts, the films on schedule have all been well-received to date.

But, if your missed the early screenings, you have the opportunity to catch the tail end. Over the next couple of days as the Festival winds down, there are still a handful of important insightful and innovative films to take in.

For instance, the documentary "Beautiful Losers".

During the course of the much-anticipated event this year, the Newport Beach Film Festival showcased more than 350 entries from around the world and in the process managed to offer up an ambitious international selection of features, shorts, documentaries, and animated shorts that compete for both the Jury and Audience awards.

The 9th Annual Festival focuses on World and U.S. premieres, Academy Award entries, Sundance Selections, a Spotlight Series, and Children's Festival projects from both the independents and the majors alike.

Submissions are far-flung too - from Asia, Europe, South & Central America, and Africa - for instance.

The celluloid pieces are both classic and contemporary in nature and amount to a unique mix of genres influenced by a myriad of cultures.

In their "mission statement", the Festival organizers note that it is their intention to bring to Orange County the best of classic and contemporary filmmaking from around the world.

Newport Fest is also committed to delivering up not only a first-class international film program, but also a forum for cultural understanding, backed by enriching educational opportunities.

And, they've met that challenge in an exciting diverse way.

The Festival supports the creation and advancement of innovative and artistic cinematic works of both emerging and seasoned filmmakers and proudly embraces their passion, independent spirit, and vision.

With the integration of the local community and educational institutions into all aspects of the Festival, the celebrated annual event has stimulated an interest in the study and appreciation of film and - likewise - encouraged people of all ages and backgrounds to participate, according to their press release.

Over the past decade, the Festival has unveiled many acclaimed feature films such as - "Crash", "Layer Cake", "Dust to Glory", "Sexy Beast", "Spellbound", "Dogtown and Z Boys", "Joint Security Area", and "Castle in the Sky".

In addition, the organizers have taken a look back in time with classics such as - "The French Connection", "Sunset Boulevard", the "50th anniversary of Jim Henson Company", and "The Outsiders".

Because of this unique approach to the film-going experience, the Newport Beach Film Festival has garnered acclaim from audiences and distributors alike.

Record numbers - about 40,000 strong - are expected to take the sojourn to Newport this year.

In fact, the numbers are growing each year.

In addition to the films, the founders have scheduled question and answer periods, so that filmgoers and industry-insiders have the rare opportunity to meet up-close and personal with filmmakers, directors, screenwriters and cinematographers eager to share their work with a captive public.

So, if you haven't savored the experience yet, head down to the tony enclave for the last two days of the Festival.

You'll be glad you didn't pass on the opportunity.

As Stanley Kubrick once opined:

"A film is never really good unless the camera is an eye in the head of a poet."

http://www.julianayrs.com

Fan gets physical...PDA ban lifted for a sec!

Old-fashioned Courtship preferred...


Last night I slipped into The Abbey for about thirty minutes to check out the scene.

After all, the trendy watering hole on Robertson in West Hollywood is quite the social whirl around 6 p.m. on Sunday evenings.

Good-looking, fashionably-attired patrons are inclined to sip on exotic cocktails, engage in a little cruising, and occasionally shake their booty a bit when an upbeat popular hit strikes up over the powerful loud speakers strategically placed around the artfully-decorated bar.

After chatting up a handful of acquaintances, I sauntered out into the street, homeward bound.

To stay in shape, I usually stroll around the pristine neighborhood on foot - rather than hop in my wheels. After all, burning a few calories here and there, keeps my lean bod in shape!

As I headed up Santa Monica Boulevard, I suddenly spied two handsome young men making a beeline for me.

Or, was it my imagination?

I half-expected that when they neared my position on the sidewalk - that they would skirt to one side - and let me pass. Surprise! Instead, the duo strutted right towards me, and summarily, blocked my path!

Was I going to finally have the opportunity to try out my Karate on real live subjects, at long last?

Finally, when one of the dudes got about "this-close" in my face, his eyes went wide as he stared into my eyes and gushed -

"I want a hug!"

Well, in my youth, public displays of affection (PDA's) were greatly scorned upon. But, what the heck, I was in a good mood.

A fan is a fan, right?

Needless to say, at the back of my mind, I thought the request odd in the bright light of day!

As we hugged for a sec, his friend chimed in, "He wants 'ya".

Sorry, dude! A lone hug would have to suffice.

After all, I'm one of those old-fashioned types.

I prefer to be wined and dined a bit before I'm inclined to jump in the hay!

America's Got Talent...MySpace invite to compete on the talent show! Win a million bucks.

So, ‘ya think you've got talent, kid?

Can you lick your nose with your tongue, or perform untold pretzel-twisting feats with your flamboyant flexible bod?

Just maybe, you can belt out a tune and touch the masses, not unlike the mesmerizing Paul Pots managed to in recent days?

If so, then sign up with MySpace to appear on the final taping of the musical entertainment extravaganza - "America's Got Talent" - and an opportunity to win a million bucks!

Here's what you have to do to be considered for an appearance on the hit talent show.

SEND A TAPE NOW
Don't delay or you'll miss the last call for videotape submissions.

FOLLOW THREE EASY STEPS
*Submit a 2-3 minute videotape of your act.
*The performance must be a "cover version" of a published tune.
*Make sure your entry is not an original song.

CONTEST RULES
*The show accepts VHS & DV tapes & DVDs only.
*No hi-8's or formats that need VHS adaptors allowed.
*Label the entry with name, address, and phone number.

SUBMISSION INFO
*Download and complete three forms:
*Eligibility Requirements * Casting Info Sheet *Release Form.
*Answer all questions.

WARNING
America's Got Talent will not view a tape unless the contestant has completed, signed, and enclosed the "Casting Info Sheet" and "Personal Release" form.

SUBMISSIONS
The Producers
America's Got Talent (Season 3)
3727 W. Magnolia Blvd.
#808
Burbank, CA 91505

Break a leg!


Judges kibbitz on sidelines...

Sunglasses...cool, casual, colorful! Out of the shade, into spotlight!

Ah, the lazy days of summer are upon us!

When I zipped into my favorite Starbucks outlet in West Hollywood, I couldn't help but notice the festive eye-catching shades on the snoz of one of the kids who plies the eclectic cafe treats there.

The quirky fun specs were somewhat reminiscent of a pair of poindexters, but the rims screamed out in a pop-inspired fire-engine red!

Very cool!

You know, since I became a transplant to sunny California, it has always surprised me how many people in the BIG ORANGE trounce around town - wearing sandals in open jeeps with T's off or with their top-of-the-line Benz convertible rag-tops down - without donning a pair of sunglasses for protection under the sizzlin' mid-day solar rays.

Vanity be thy name?

Yes, I expect a handful of Hollywood hopefuls are anxious to show off their pretty mugs in tantalizing Tinsel town where an all-elusive break into the biz is just a glance away.

But, for longevity's sake (unless you want to play character actors for the rest of your life) it's always wise to cover up when splashing into the zesty beach days of summer each year.

After all, treks in the scorching sun without shades get 'ya squinting - and over time - etch out some nasty crow's feet up-close and personal to your luminous baby blues.

Notwithstanding, scrutinizing objects in the bright sun without protection may eventually cause irreversible damage to the retina of the eye.

So, it's important to not only sport shades, but ensure the pair you snap up have maximum Ultra Violet (UV) protection!

But, forget rims in "granny styles". After all, wrap-a-round coverage is best.

Of course, there are many brands to choose from!

Ray-Bans, as always, are Top Gun!

And, in 90210 (Beverly Hills, dahlink!) designer shades with ubiquitous logos upfront and screeching "money" are always in vogue.

But, if you're on a budget or continually misplacing your fave pair (like moi!), occasionally - and for a song with a stroke of luck - you'll be able to snatch up a real snazzy pair at the 99 cent store.

But, scan for the UV protection sticker, please!

Another benefit of protection?

In a matter of weeks you'll also notice the texture and tone of the skin around the eyes noticeably improved.

It saves face! Just ask my pals, below.